We probably have more in common than we think
Someone who says, “You’ve changed” to you is actually saying, “you’ve grown.” It means you’re figuring out who you are. You’re evolving into a person that’s different than what they’ve seen.
When I was young, I watched everyone around me. Like you, I was taught right and wrong by the standards and knowledge of those that surrounded me. I was instructed to color inside the lines, and to say please and thank you.
Then, as I grew older, my social networks expanded. I met new people and learn about their experiences. I made friends and hung out at their houses and learned about their families. My world expanded and when that happened, I began to see life in new ways.
Like me, you had new experiences that raised new questions about how the world works. You also may have sought out others who could provide you with answers and to feel understood.
Our views of the world are always changing, because we are always changing. We learn that other people have had different life experiences than us. Like you, I’ve outgrown relationships. Not everyone will match our level of growth.
Understanding our growth
This cycle has taught me that life is tricky and messy. Everyone views the world in a way that is unique to them, including you. How you view a situation, person, or place, will be different than anyone else, because it’s your opinion. There’s always a reason behind everything, and everyone’s reasons are different. That’s what life is.
To live, and learn, and celebrate the differences between us.
It’s not your job to attempt or force someone to grow with you if they aren’t ready. They have their own obstacles to overcome, obstacles you may not be able to understand or relate to. It doesn’t mean they’re wrong, it means they have their own life and it’s different than yours.
The simple, unavoidable truth, is what makes life beautiful. If everyone walked around and looked, felt, and thought the same, well… what a dull life that would be. It’s our differences that make us grow and thrive. It’s our curiosities that have mapped the world and put people on the moon.
When someone tells you that you’ve changed, be thankful. Be thankful that you’ve had the courage to grow.